Imperfect Life

get this letter this morning before i leave my house...
just have the feeling that there will be a letter for me...
it's a letter which come with a piece of photo as a stamp
i know it's him once i saw the photo...
only both of us have it
it's adorable.... our pic as a stamp...
does not expect it will be a stamp...
so i just read the letter when i get a cab to go somewhere else...

here's the letter

hey sweetheart,

hey there, how you been recently? i mean this few night after the day we went out.I guess you never expect you will get a letter from me, huh? ya....it's a first love letter i wrote exclusively for you. i start writing it after our date.my brain can't stop flash back the momment i with you. i hold your hand while we crossed the road. you poked my waist, and i hugged you. can't stop twisting your hand with my finger. can't stop talking about guy and girl with you. So, i decided to take the risk ,get my first step out of our current relationship and i wish we manage to upgrade it after this. I'm sorry for breaking our promise as we will be friend. i just falling into your trap slowly by seeing you every time. You're just too adorable to be ignore. Yes, you do ask me will i fall in love with girl like you from the beginning and i just said NO without thinking. If i can turn the time backward, I'll say i might, i will, i do! It just so difficult for me seeing other girl besides you. You're true about you may not the prettiest, the slimmest, the cleverest among girls. The truth is you owned odd personality and you never make thing complicated as others do. It make you shine to catch my sight! Your smile and eyes are just so beautiful as angel's. i believe it do happen to other guys. The way you thinking is so pure and simple as a glass of filter water. There's nothing else in your mind, yet i not saying you're those blond girl without brain. you do have the EQ plus IQ, and you just pretend as an idiot to not showing off the intelligence of yours! althought you might do not have the knowledge to solve problem, but you just be so calm and announced it when you settled. Seriously, it amazed me. i know i might not your ideal guy, but you know what, the feeling is important than anything else! I believe you know that fact. i know it's hard for you to seeing me as your boyfriend, but can't you try it before you say no? i just wanna let you know that i'm falling in love with a girl,a girl who is reading my letter now. i try to speak chinese if you want to! i'm serious! i know you only looking guy that able to communicate with your family. Please give me a sign after this no matter it's positive or negative. i'll accept it and i won't force you, i promise!
Love,
XXXXXXX
i had thinking alot after finish it...
a friend of mine, which i just post it few days ago?
i just mentioned how he treat me when we went out together....
actually i dun know what i want...
i were expected a sunshine boy to be my boyfriend...
and here he come...
but nothing in this world is perfect, so does him!
i just dun want my love partner being so famous, so gorgeous, seems so perfect!
perfect is the imperfect!
gosh! why why why?!?
i's so happy when he wants to be my friend..
a friend like sister...
we had talk about alot thing, guy, girl, car, clothes,etc...
and now!
i dun know how to face him !
oh ya...
i haven't send the signal because my brain stop spinning for me due to the letter!
SEE! even my brain is no co-operate with me! DAMN IT!
SHIT!
i'm a girl! full of imperfect stuff!
dirty minded! money-orientated! girl-watcher!
SEE! this is not even what a girl should has!
damn damn damn! and i dun even know who to share this!
i just dun have the habit to share my stuff before it's done! or it's stabil!
so...
let us leave it to god! let him or her give me a clue, a sign!
if i dream about him when i'm sleep, i will say yes!
if not, i will just be friend with him!
ok la..
it's very very very late now!
gonna sleep!
night!

listen to : love you till the end by the pogues